During my therapy sessions I came to realise that if I felt an emotion I didn’t like I would box it up & ignore it rather than deal with why I felt that way.
This meant I was carrying around a lot of emotional baggage that I was constantly adding to & it was weighing me down.
At first you don’t notice you’re doing it (that’s how it creeps up on you). I carried on through life with my subconscious looking out for me boxing up & burying anything I couldn’t cope with until I found myself unable to carry on with life because I had too much to carry.
I was losing myself in all the emotion I was carrying around.
I ended up with little tolerance for the emotions I didn’t like & would completely over react at the slightest thing that made me angry or sad.
I cried a lot because (as I have learnt since) it was my only outlet for releasing how I felt amidst the over crowded emotions I carried around.
Talking to my therapist & confronting how things made me feel helped me to see how I had avoided dealing with things properly.
Realising how I reacted by boxing things up helped me to stop & deal with them instead of hiding them.
It was such a release to break that cycle, it took me a while to work through all the emotions I had been carrying around but once I did I actually felt lighter!
Why am I telling you this? I’m telling you because I believe that we are all very good at ignoring things & carrying on as if nothing happened.
For some it may be something huge like trying to carry on living life as normal when someone you love dearly has just died or for others it may be something small like not telling your partner something they did made you angry.
In both cases the feelings can fester & become destructive over time.
Emotions are powerful, giving in to them does not make us weak, we are human beings.